Saturday, March 31, 2018

Living On and With Purpose

How to Live Intentionally

Decide and choose to be:

     (a reasonable and manageable state of contentment)
     (considerate toward and able to relate to the feelings of others)
Truthful and Authentic
     (honest, transparent and open with self and others; behaving 
      with integrity)
      (responsible, reliable, consistent, of  good character)
     (present to the present; valuing and utilizing the moment)
     (appreciative of and able to value good things in life)     
     (able to extend oneself toward and connect with others )
Achievement Oriented 
     (setting and working toward reasonable goals)
Empowered over one's circumstances
     (behaving and viewing self as able to overcome negative
       events and circumstances; problem solving attitudes)
Emotionally in touch, self-aware and in control
     (the ability to introspect, self-reflect, self-manage and act with
     (valuing and nurturing one's well-being)
     (being hopeful and exercising faith in positive possibilities)
Proactive Instead of Reactive
     (being willing to dream, envision, plan, take initiative
       and actively aim toward one's aspirations)

Wednesday, February 28, 2018

What Happens To You Does Not Define You

What Happens To You Does Not Define You
Healthy Ways to Deal With Negative Circumstances and Events

You are not your circumstance
  • It is important to recognize that negative situations and circumstances are something we may experience.  We are in a negative situation; not of it.
  • Externalize negative situations, instead of internalizing a negative self-assessment         (punishing yourself; excessive guilt or shame; feeling unworthy; becoming depressed)

Recognize how you survived and may have even overcome a past negative situation.
  • Value your strengths and qualities that have enabled you to get through 
  • Give yourself credit for having healed and gotten to a better place

 Focus on ways to cope, get through and overcome a current negative situation
  • Adopt a problem solving attitude and seek possible solutions and resources
  • Recognize when a situation is temporary, so that you realize you will not get stuck
  • Aim for and look forward to what you wish to experience after the negative situation ends

Take back your power over the negative circumstance
  • See what lessons you might have or can learned
  • See the possible opportunities within and beyond the situation
  • Recognize or assign meaning for this occurrence in your life
Be Grateful
Appreciate ways that the situation did not destroy you
Focus on and value what you still have, in spite of the negative circumstance

Wednesday, February 14, 2018

Happy Valentine's Day: Redefined ! Celebrating Loving Self and Others


Let's broaden the Valentine's Day concept to loving ourselves and others, no matter the nature of our relationships. Also, let's recognize it as a way to celebrate loving ourselves and others all year long.

It is essential to remember that giving and receiving healthy love starts with loving ourselves.  Here are some healthy-self love guidelines.

Healthy Self-Love
Knowing oneself
Positive Self-Worth / Priority
Valuing oneself and needs
Self-Respect /Integrity
Having consistent standards
and Healthy boundaries
Self-Acceptance /Authenticity
Embracing and being oneself
Feeling Capable
Recognizing talents & skills
Feeling Accomplished
Sense of competence
Feeling Secure
Trusting oneself
Feeling Empowered
Being in control of self and decisions
Being Responsible for Self
Good self-care

Wednesday, January 31, 2018

Do's and Don'ts of Self-Confidence: How to Feel More Confident, Capable and Worthwhile

Feeling good about oneself is essential to being happy and successful in life. Below, in the "Do" column are strategies to achieve increased self-confidence, self-worth and  sense of capability.  In contrast, in the "Do Not" column are attitudes and practices that rob us of these positive and healthy feelings.

Do                                                                                                                   Do Not 

Compare Yourself Only With Yourself                                           Compare Yourself to Others
  • Challenge Yourself to Accomplish New Goals
  • Measure Your Progress Toward Your Goal
Give Yourself Credit for Your Achievements                                 Focus on Your Failures  
  • Feel Good About Your Accomplishments
  • Remind Yourself About Past Achievements

Recognize Your Talents, Skills and Abilities                                  Focus on What You Lack
  • See How They are Reflected in Your Performance
  • Value and Appreciate Your Positive Qualities 

Believe in and Trust Yourself                                                           Doubt Yourself
  • Remind Yourself of Experiences of Triumph                                   
  • Recognize How You Overcame Fear
  • See How You Worked Through Pain and Tragedies
  • Note Ways You Conquered Failure
  • Identify Times You Were Resilient and Persevered
Exercise a Positive and Optimistic Attitude                                   Practice Negative Thinking     
  • See the Possibilities
  • Focus on Your Abundance (vs. what you lack)
  • Exercise Faith, Hope and Determination
  • Practice an Attitude of Gratitude

Respect and Exercise Your Personal Power                                   Assign Your Power to 
  • See Yourself as In, not Of a Circumstance
  • Respect and Exercise Healthy Boundaries

Love Yourself                                                                                     Put Yourself Down
  • Treat Yourself Well
  • Accept Yourself With Your Assets and Flaws
  • Practice Healthy Self-Care
  • Engage in Things That Bring Joy and Fun

Living On and With Purpose

How to Live Intentionally Decide and choose to be: Happy       (a reasonable and manageable state of contentment) Empathic       (...