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Showing posts from 2013

Happier Holidays: Managing Financial Stress

Happier Holidays Reducing Financial Stress and Increasing Enjoyment ·         Are you feeling stress or pressure to buy gifts for others that you cannot afford? ·         Are you still paying for items purchased during last year’s holiday season? ·         Are you going into deeper debt to pay for holiday gifts and expenses? ·         Do you feel guilty about not being able to afford to buy gifts for loved ones? ·         Are you feeling anxious or depressed about finances during the holidays? If you answered “Yes” to any or all of these questions, do not despair.   Here are 12 tips to help you enjoy the holidays and feel in control of your finances. Set and stick to a budget; Pay cash; and Avoid credit expenditures. Shop online for items that cost more in brick and mortar stores. Spend quality time with loved ones and enjoy the gift of each other’s  presence.    Attend free or low cost events such as concerts, social gatherings, community pro

Living with "What Is" vs. "What If"

"What If?": The "what If?" thinking state can take two forms.  The more common version is comprised of concerns about future things, usually negative, that have not yet occurred.  An  example of this is when we are considering taking some action and we begin entertaining a litany of what ifs", related to the things we can imagine going wrong. When we experience this form, we are likely to experience a great deal of anxiety and fear to move ahead with a decision and action. The other manifestation of "what if" thinking involves dwelling on the past and on some outcome that we wish had occurred, that in reality, did not happen.  An example of past "what if" thinking is when we berate ourselves for not taking a particular course of action because the decision we actually made had a less than desirable outcome.  In such cases, we are likely to experience regret, sadness, disappointment, as well as sometimes self-blame due to our past actions.

Coping With Job Loss

Coping With Job Loss:   Overcoming Crisis and Moving toward Success Presenter:   Diane Kern, Ph.D. Creator of Happy & Healthy U Seminars The loss of a job is one of the most difficult life events and source of significant stress.  Experiencing emotional distress in response to losing one’s job is very common and to be expected.   The typical experience is grief, which is constituted by several emotional stages.   The model of such grief is characterized by the following stages: 1.        Shock, Disbelief, and Denial:   This is often the initial reaction to losing a job; that the job loss does not feel real.   2.          Anger/ Resentment/ Bitterness:   Feeling angered about the manner in which one’s job was terminated is very common.   It is important to recognize the underlying feelings that prompt the anger.   Such anger is particularly intense when one feels that they were unfairly terminated; mistreated while they were employed; or unappreciated an

Looking for Love? Start by Loving Yourself!

The month of February is traditionally associated with Valentine's Day.  Although it is coming to a close,  love is never out of date.  So, here are some reflections on healthy love. We are much more likely to attract, select and sustain healthy loving relationships with others, when we love and value ourselves in a healthy way.  Whatever attitude and perception we have of ourselves, we carry with us and project to others.  Therefore, one's self-image, one's sense of adequacy, self-worth are critical to the way we treat ourselves and allow others to treat us.  Here are some important guidelines and elements to loving ourselves well. Being Authentic:  Being who we really are, without pretending or faking a false sense of self.  Embracing Self-Acceptance:  Loving our total selves, including our strengths and imperfections. Taking Responsibility for Our Actions:  Acknowledging our shortcomings and making positive changes.  Forgiving Ourselves for Past Mist

A New Year; A New Attitude of Appreciation

Being grateful for surviving 2012!      Welcoming 2013! Psychological research findings show that being grateful can help persons effectively cope with challenging and painful life events and avoid becoming depressed. In other words, appreciating what one has, as opposed to focusing on what is missing, helps promote optimistic attitudes that are more likely to provide us with the energy to tackle life problems. Pessimistic and distorted attitudes, perceptions and thoughts are well known to be associated with depressed mood. Therefore, one's thoughts are powerful and impact emotions and actions. One's circumstances do not define a person's sense of self, unless internal personal power is surrendered to the pain of negative external events. Fortunately,  one has total power to manage and change attitudes, perceptions and thoughts in ways that are accurate and positive.  To generate an attitude of gratitude in your life, consider the following strategies: Recognize